Needy

I sucked in Ryan's lyrical HipHop class today! I looked and felt super nua! Really need to keep working on it!! Bleah! Times like this, I feel like such a mediocre dancer. Maybe even less than mediocre even! How to make it like this?? Everything looks dim and I feel worthless during times like this...

I need more baggy tee shirts, long sleeve pullovers and baggy sweatpants!
I need to get my hair fixed, it's a mess right now.
My complexion is really baddddddd.
I look like an outright mess.

I always bash myself down and then painfully crawl back up!! *Repeat cycle*
Need to look and feel good. Need to get better in dance. Need confidence. Need strength! Need to do so much....

I wonder if I will just decide to drop down one day and never get up?

Hmm....question existing?

I'm not making sense.